Friday, October 9, 2009
Am I just being lazy?
Because My Friend has connections everywhere (ev-er-ry-where!), an awesome opportunity presented itself last night. My Friend has a friend (The Trainer) who is an ex-bodybuilder and is retired and who, now, spends time training others. My Friend took it upon himself to stop and talk to The Trainer about me telling him that I have been weighing my options in regard to some kind of physical fitness activities. The Trainer then kindly offered his services three days a week for $20 per week.
$20 per week people! Do you know how stinking cheap that is? For your own personal trainer!!! And he essentially offered to come to me. To bring his person to my person and kick my butt for $20 per week!
I am hesitant. Why? Two reasons.
Reason #1) $20 per week doesn't seem like much until you say $80 per month. Did I mention that overtime is, well, over? I am already back on a stringent budget. However, My Friend offered to pay for this. Why? Because he feels he owes me.
Reason #2) In part, I feel like I am just being lazy. Paying someone to help me do something that I know full well I can do myself. I have gotten out there before and ran all summer long. That is where it usually stops though. I go for a summer and become a couch potato through the winter and spring.
I don't know what to do. Do I go for it? Am I just being lazy by not getting out there and doing it myself? Didn't Dr. Phil say, "Sometimes action has to come before motivation?" What do you think?
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
The Night Owl Backslide
Photo courtesy belgianchocolate Living in a day-timers world makes it really difficult to truly be my night owl self. We night owls must adapt to the early bird schedule being forced to work those 8-5 jobs. And what I have discovered is that, no matter how hard I try to change my habits, I am still whole-heartedly, 100% a night owl.
For the last three months, I have been forced to be an early bird. Getting out of bed between 5:00 am - 5:30 am five (sometimes six) days a week. I thought I was doing fairly well, too. I felt good. I forced myself into bed most nights by 10:00. On the rare occasion that I stayed up later, I suffered the next morning. I survived though. After a while, getting up didn't seem so bad. I thought that maybe, just maybe I was actually breaking old habits and adapting a new schedule. I was ever-so-hopeful that my inner clock was resetting itself. I honestly thought I had a huge breakthrough.
But no. Nope. Not at all. Since the overtime ceased, so has my early mornings and my timeliness. (Have I mentioned that I am never on time either?) I still maintain my 10 o'clock bedtime and can now sleep until 7:00 am and I am having a harder time getting out of bed now than I was having when I was getting up BEFORE the butt crack of dawn. So what is the deal? Am I getting too much sleep?
I thought maybe I was just in a bit of a hormonal slump that would pass in a week or so. But my motivation has yet to return. I take my time crawling out of bed. I dawdle in the mornings. I find anything else there is to do besides getting in the shower. I procrastinate doing my hair. I will throw in a load of laundry, start the dishwasher, make the bed. Anything besides get myself ready for the day. I. Just. Don't. Feel. Like. It. I don't feel like doing much of anything. Until, that is, it's really time to go to bed. Then, I lay there for an hour, eyes wide open, wishing I could fall asleep.
When will this cycle end? Or am I doomed forever and ever to be a night owl living in a day-timers world?
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Higgledy-Piggledy, Take I
My mind is all over the place today. I have a zillion miscellaneous things running through my brain and I really don’t know what to do with all of them. Fortunately, I have this space here in bloggy world where I can share and say whatever I want. So, without further ado, I give you my Higgledy-Piggledy bits.
My mom got a car. For an ordinary person, this really isn’t a huge deal. For my mom, this is colossal! I believe I have mentioned before that my mom is an alcoholic. I know I don’t have to tell you that drinking + driving is not anywhere near the beginnings of a good equation.
My mom has not driven or owned a car for a few years now. She has already had a DUI and a reckless driving for leaving the scene of an accident (it was a drinking related accident that they couldn’t prove). The last time she really drove, she was in an accident with an older woman in the car and she claims that the car flipped all the way over and landed back on its wheels. I was not there so I cannot vouch for this, but this is what she says. She also claims she hadn’t been drinking.
To add to matters, my mom is a very anxious person. EVERYTHING makes her nervous. Even riding in a car with a very good, safe driver, my mom will grip the door handle, hold her belly, close her eyes, and grit her teeth.
If I am honest, I will admit to being upset about someone (her boyfriend of sorts) buying her a car. Not only is it a danger for my mother and to my mother to be behind the wheel, it is a danger to other drivers on the road. I don’t care how much she promises to not drive after drinking, we all are aware of how drinking impairs judgment. It only takes ONE time!
Regrettably, there is nothing I can do. She is an adult with a valid driver’s license. As sad as this may sound, I have begun to wonder if I should explore life insurance policies. That is how much the idea of my mother driving scares me!
I recently went to my doctor for my annual exam. This is a new family doctor for me and I really like her. I had intentions of seeing one of the other physicians in the office, but they were not accepting patients. It all turned out for the best though. She listens to me. She understands that I know my own body. When something isn’t right, I know and she listens. It also isn’t necessary for me to arrange an office visit every time I need something or have a problem. Sometimes I can call and she will write the prescription for me or she will return my call and discuss my issue with me over the phone. She calls and reports to me any test results as well. I really like her.
At my annual exam, she suggested I start eating yogurt and taking a B complex vitamin. Check and check! I immediately starting eating yogurt mixed with Fiber One cereal every morning. (I love Fiber One cereal! It might look like rabbit pellets, but it tastes good and it is even sweet. Plus, a whole day’s fiber in one cup!) My only issue is that she wants me to eat Activia. Activia, however, contains high fructose corn syrup which we are all increasingly aware is not good for our bodies. So, instead, I opted for Stonyfield Organic Yogurt. It has the same probiotic as the Activia. Sweet!
My only issues, now are…
1) I need to stop drinking so much Mountain Dew. (Did I mention high fructose corn syrup already? Yeah, I think so.) If you are unaware, I love MD. I do limit myself, but this is one habit I really need to kick to the curb.
2) Drink water. I have never been a big fan of water. It is tasteless and unpleasant for me to consume. I have had bouts in the past where I have drank considerable amounts of water, as I am supposed to, but they were always chug sessions. Chug it on my drive to work. Chug it on my drive home. Give me a limited time span and I’d chug. But to just sit around sipping water, I’ll pass!
3) Exercise! I really do like working out…once I get into it. It’s getting into it that seems to be my current road block. I will do really well for about a week and a half and then fall flat on my face. I know that I feel so much better in so many ways when I exercise. I benefit both mentally and physically. So what in the world is my problem??
I have noticed, recently, that I have begun to put on a few pounds. Again. I went through this last year. I gained, roughly, ten pounds. I went up a pant size. I bought all new clothes to accommodate. I tried not to make too much of a fuss about it and be accepting. After all, at my age, I think it’s fairly natural for a woman to put on a few pounds. I also never really gained the freshman 15 that people talk about. I am naturally small framed so it isn’t like I ballooned up and am suddenly obese. However, I do not want to have to go through this process all over again. I am not going to buy all new clothes again to accommodate. I also know that regular exercise will help in this area and will be better for me because I really do sit on my keister all. day. long. For overall and long term health, I know I need to exercise. I really want to tell myself to JUST DO IT ALREADY!
For the last three months solid, I have been working 5-10 hours of overtime every week. Overtime has, now, come to a bittersweet end. The sweet - I am glad it is over. No more working Saturdays, no more 7 am start times and no more eleven hour days. The bitter - it brings back the strain of very carefully watching my cash flow because there is no more overtime pay.
Now what? I have already started thinking about a second job. Hello JCPenney holiday helper? It’s a possibility. I have family in town who own a small bar. I could always ask for a waitressing job. I’m cute. (Not to be conceited or anything.) I could get some tips even if the service sucks. Which it would. Who am I kidding. I’m no waitress! Ugh.
Somehow, last year, I received a call from the local Muscular Dystrophy Association to participate in their annual lockup fundraiser. That was fine. I did it. I raised about $600. They called again this year. They are sneaky little buggers. The caller ID lists a person’s name, not that they are calling from MDA. So, again, I am roped into attempting to raise money. (Because I can’t say no. It’s my own fault really.) Unfortunately, I am new to this area so raising money through people I know for this area is hard. Though a worthy cause, Muscular Dystrophy is not a cause that I am totally passionate about. I am trying to raise money this year, but it isn’t going so well.
Watch for Higgledy-Piggledy, Take II coming soon!
Friday, September 25, 2009
Sweet Georgia Brown
This past weekend, I made a quick trip to Georgia to visit my niece, Kelsey.
When I say a quick trip, I literally mean a quick trip. Because I had to be at work on Friday for our biannual professional development day, I was forced to take a later flight Friday night. I arrived in Atlanta, Georgia around 9:30 pm and we had a good hour plus drive to where she actually lives. (I’m told everything is within an hour of Atlanta.) Since we both worked that day (and poor Kels has been shoveling clay all week for a project at work), we both were completely wiped and ready for bed. I also tried to get a late afternoon flight home on Sunday in order to squeeze in as much time with Kelsey as possible, but even a 4:58 flight didn’t seem late enough with having to be to the airport early enough to make it through security and find my way to my gate. I was in Georgia for less than a mere 48 hours. It was totally worth it though.
Ever since I can remember, I have always wanted to be a good aunt. With my sister being 10 years older than me, though, it was kind of hard to be the aunt I wanted to be because I was still growing up when she started having children. Growing up, my life with consumed by the turmoil’s of a teenager with an alcoholic mother and a dad who I knew loved me but felt very distant because he had his own life with my stepmom. I did the best I could attending every birthday, Christmas or Thanksgiving dinner that I could, but it still never felt like it was enough. I’ve always yearned for a close-knit family and I tried to be as close with my sister and her family as I could, but it still never seemed to turn out the way I hoped.
I imagined having the kids over for sleepovers and watching movies and eating popcorn. I imagined being the cool aunt, the fun aunt. I hoped to be a friend they would call when they were in trouble or resisting their parent’s authority. Up until recently, I was so wrapped up in my own problems that I was never able to fully be a part of their lives as I had wanted to be. I never was any of those things that I wanted to be and have carried guilt and regret with me because of it for many years.
To worsen matters, a few years ago I was taken in by my sister and her family to help me through a rough time. It was then that I learned that Kelsey thought that I didn’t like her. I was floored because I loved her dearly, but if I am honest I can say that I know why she may have felt that way. At that time, Kels was becoming her own person. She was in her early teens and she was developing a strong personality. At that point in my life, and even now, I have a hard time dealing with strong personalities. She had strong opinions and was never afraid to voice those opinions and I was having a hard time communicating and relating to her at then. But it was never, never that I didn’t love or like her.
All this to tell you that this is one of the reasons I felt so compelled to make sure this trip happen. I felt , too, it would be important to show Kelsey that she is important. With this being the first time she has been away from her home for such a long time (she’s been there since January), it would show her that she is important to me and to her family by making the time to visit her and taking interest in where her life is going and what that entails. I also believe that it is important to encourage her and support her in the path she feels God is leading her to take.
Ever since Kelsey was a little girl, I have always felt in my heart that she would be a missionary, as did many others. She is, now, living the life of a missionary with very strong convictions regarding how she is to live her life. To watch her grow, develop, become a woman, and become an important voice and example for the Kingdom of God is indescribable. I admire her strength as a person and her passion for God and service to His Kingdom.
These are all things I wanted to tell her while I was there, but I could not muster the strength to do so. I hope she knows how much I love her, support her and admire her. She is a true blessing to my life.
So now that I have shared most of my reasons for visiting my niece in Georgia, I should share with you what my visit entailed.
Saturday morning, we woke up and Kelsey made breakfast. She doesn’t know this, but I hate to cook so I gladly sat back and let her make me breakfast. Eggs, bacon, coffee, and crescent rolls. Scrumdiddly! We got ourselves together and she took me for a tour of her the place where she works and showed me the additional project she took on. (She is planting flowers on a steep hill that is nothing but clay. She is brave, but a very hard worker.) From there we headed to Amicalola Falls State Park. Georgia has gotten a lot of rain recently and that day was no exception. We still decided to venture out into the wilderness of the park regardless of the rain.
We had a nice walk down the path and climbed the steps that took us to the top of Amicalola Falls.
The falls were beautiful.
From the top of the falls looking out and down.
After we came down from the Falls, we headed back to grab some dinner at the Lanier Diner.
They had the most scrumdiddlyumtious looking desserts! (We got some to go.)
After dinner, we stopped at the redbox (http://www.redbox.com/ ) at Wal-Mart (She is truly a frugal chic! She learned it from her mom. I love that about her.) to grab a movie and headed back to her place and settled in for the night.
On Sunday, we got ourselves around and I packed up my things. We loaded the car and headed out for some shopping at the biggest mall in Georgia. We had lunch when we got there because neither of us had had breakfast and we had arrived before the stores had opened. We then perused the mall for a few hours. At that point, it was time for me to head to the airport.
We had some good conversations over the weekend. I think we both learned a few things about each other. I am grateful to have her in my life. She is an inspiration to me. And I hope she knows, truly, how much I love and cherish her.
P.S. Sweet Georgia Brown really has nothing to do with this story. The song is nostalgic for me and it has the word Georgia in the title. That’s all.
When I say a quick trip, I literally mean a quick trip. Because I had to be at work on Friday for our biannual professional development day, I was forced to take a later flight Friday night. I arrived in Atlanta, Georgia around 9:30 pm and we had a good hour plus drive to where she actually lives. (I’m told everything is within an hour of Atlanta.) Since we both worked that day (and poor Kels has been shoveling clay all week for a project at work), we both were completely wiped and ready for bed. I also tried to get a late afternoon flight home on Sunday in order to squeeze in as much time with Kelsey as possible, but even a 4:58 flight didn’t seem late enough with having to be to the airport early enough to make it through security and find my way to my gate. I was in Georgia for less than a mere 48 hours. It was totally worth it though.
Ever since I can remember, I have always wanted to be a good aunt. With my sister being 10 years older than me, though, it was kind of hard to be the aunt I wanted to be because I was still growing up when she started having children. Growing up, my life with consumed by the turmoil’s of a teenager with an alcoholic mother and a dad who I knew loved me but felt very distant because he had his own life with my stepmom. I did the best I could attending every birthday, Christmas or Thanksgiving dinner that I could, but it still never felt like it was enough. I’ve always yearned for a close-knit family and I tried to be as close with my sister and her family as I could, but it still never seemed to turn out the way I hoped.
I imagined having the kids over for sleepovers and watching movies and eating popcorn. I imagined being the cool aunt, the fun aunt. I hoped to be a friend they would call when they were in trouble or resisting their parent’s authority. Up until recently, I was so wrapped up in my own problems that I was never able to fully be a part of their lives as I had wanted to be. I never was any of those things that I wanted to be and have carried guilt and regret with me because of it for many years.
To worsen matters, a few years ago I was taken in by my sister and her family to help me through a rough time. It was then that I learned that Kelsey thought that I didn’t like her. I was floored because I loved her dearly, but if I am honest I can say that I know why she may have felt that way. At that time, Kels was becoming her own person. She was in her early teens and she was developing a strong personality. At that point in my life, and even now, I have a hard time dealing with strong personalities. She had strong opinions and was never afraid to voice those opinions and I was having a hard time communicating and relating to her at then. But it was never, never that I didn’t love or like her.
All this to tell you that this is one of the reasons I felt so compelled to make sure this trip happen. I felt , too, it would be important to show Kelsey that she is important. With this being the first time she has been away from her home for such a long time (she’s been there since January), it would show her that she is important to me and to her family by making the time to visit her and taking interest in where her life is going and what that entails. I also believe that it is important to encourage her and support her in the path she feels God is leading her to take.
Ever since Kelsey was a little girl, I have always felt in my heart that she would be a missionary, as did many others. She is, now, living the life of a missionary with very strong convictions regarding how she is to live her life. To watch her grow, develop, become a woman, and become an important voice and example for the Kingdom of God is indescribable. I admire her strength as a person and her passion for God and service to His Kingdom.
These are all things I wanted to tell her while I was there, but I could not muster the strength to do so. I hope she knows how much I love her, support her and admire her. She is a true blessing to my life.
So now that I have shared most of my reasons for visiting my niece in Georgia, I should share with you what my visit entailed.
Saturday morning, we woke up and Kelsey made breakfast. She doesn’t know this, but I hate to cook so I gladly sat back and let her make me breakfast. Eggs, bacon, coffee, and crescent rolls. Scrumdiddly! We got ourselves together and she took me for a tour of her the place where she works and showed me the additional project she took on. (She is planting flowers on a steep hill that is nothing but clay. She is brave, but a very hard worker.) From there we headed to Amicalola Falls State Park. Georgia has gotten a lot of rain recently and that day was no exception. We still decided to venture out into the wilderness of the park regardless of the rain.
We had a nice walk down the path and climbed the steps that took us to the top of Amicalola Falls.
The falls were beautiful.
From the top of the falls looking out and down.
After we came down from the Falls, we headed back to grab some dinner at the Lanier Diner.
They had the most scrumdiddlyumtious looking desserts! (We got some to go.)
After dinner, we stopped at the redbox (http://www.redbox.com/ ) at Wal-Mart (She is truly a frugal chic! She learned it from her mom. I love that about her.) to grab a movie and headed back to her place and settled in for the night.
On Sunday, we got ourselves around and I packed up my things. We loaded the car and headed out for some shopping at the biggest mall in Georgia. We had lunch when we got there because neither of us had had breakfast and we had arrived before the stores had opened. We then perused the mall for a few hours. At that point, it was time for me to head to the airport.
We had some good conversations over the weekend. I think we both learned a few things about each other. I am grateful to have her in my life. She is an inspiration to me. And I hope she knows, truly, how much I love and cherish her.
P.S. Sweet Georgia Brown really has nothing to do with this story. The song is nostalgic for me and it has the word Georgia in the title. That’s all.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
CONGRATULATIONS Kevin Skinner
I admit that I am not a huge fan of television these days. My Friend seems to have several shows that he watches regularly so, when he's there, we watch a bit of tv together. As such, I've seen the majority of the episodes of America's Got Talent this season. I am uber excited that Kevin Skinner won the hearts of America and was given such an awesome opportunity. Such a humble man who appeared to work hard to make an honest living. I pray that fame and fortunate doesn't change that. I was ecstatic that he won. I was pulling for him from the minute he opened his mouth at the audition.
My Friend doesn't understand when I say this but I feel Mr. Skinner is my kind of people. A small town, country boy who is doing the best he can with what he has been given. Coming from a small town where country is a way of life, I felt connected him. Not literally, of course. But a sense of joy came over me to see a country boy representing others like him in such a remarkable way. I only wish that people would stop referring to him as "the chicken catcher". They laugh and mock him and it pisses me off. It may not be a true profession to some and those unfamiliar with farming in general look down and such a job and scoff at it. It’s an honest living and, as cliché as it is, someone has to do it.
I digress…
My Friend doesn't understand when I say this but I feel Mr. Skinner is my kind of people. A small town, country boy who is doing the best he can with what he has been given. Coming from a small town where country is a way of life, I felt connected him. Not literally, of course. But a sense of joy came over me to see a country boy representing others like him in such a remarkable way. I only wish that people would stop referring to him as "the chicken catcher". They laugh and mock him and it pisses me off. It may not be a true profession to some and those unfamiliar with farming in general look down and such a job and scoff at it. It’s an honest living and, as cliché as it is, someone has to do it.
I digress…
Kevin Skinner –
CONGRATULATIONS! You deserve such a blessing in your life!
May you have all your heart desires and may you remain the humble man you started out as forever!
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